Sporadic Sequential
Tuesday, August 07, 2007
Iron Man Dickery, Pre-Civil War Edition

One recurring complaint about Civil War and its aftermath has been that it damaged the character of Iron Man, turning Tony Stark into an unlikeable dick. After reading an old Iron Man annual, though, I'm thinking that perhaps Iron Man's dickishness was a well-established character trait. Consider:

Iron Man says doors are for chumps who can't afford to smash through walls:

"Who has time for doors with their complicated knobs and locks? It's easier just to smash your way through whatever architectural feature happens to be in your way!"

If you don't accept Iron Man's apology, he will hit you in the face until you do:

"Look, I said I was sorry, so I'm going to keep punching you in the face until you accept my apology!! And I said I was too busy to play Scrabble, so that's another punch in the face!"

BONUS PANELS: How modern comics have ruined my enjoyment of older comics.

1. I can't read panels like the one below without imagining the erotic fanfic it has undoubtedly spawned:

Bonus Creepy Points: In the preceding panel, Black Widow remarked to Hercules how being carried on his shoulders reminded her of her father.

2. When I see scenes like the one below, I worry about Brad Meltzer getting ideas for a shocking new series revealing previously unknown details from a Seventies superhero team's sordid past.

"See, everyone always thinks A.I.M. is just a bunch of goofy goons in beekeeper outfits. But what if we reveal that a group of them held the Black Widow down and then..." [I'll leave that last bit unfinished because there's only so far I'm willing to go to make yet another joke about Identity Crisis's creepy sexual politics.]

All panels from Iron Man Annual #4 (1977), reprinted in the misleadingly named Champions Classic Volume 2.

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