Sporadic Sequential
Wednesday, April 01, 2009
The Trials and Tribulations of A Salaryman

Apologies for not updating the blog more frequently, but, as you can guess, work has been brutal lately. I know I've complained about the office politics before, but things are getting even more cutthroat recently. Sometimes I wonder if I'm just being paranoid, but I swear some of the older workers have it in for me, and mainly as a means of protecting their own fragile positions. It's disheartening. I don't mind getting rough and dirty and fighting to prove my worth, but the politics is so petty. It would be one thing if people were fighting to protect their pet projects but many of the worst offenders don't even seem to produce anything of value for the company. How can these people get up and look at themselves in the mirror each morning? Don't they understand what it means to be a true SALARYMAN?

I remember when I first started working as a salaryman. I was so optimistic, so energetic, so naive. I truly thought I would rise to the top on talent alone and that my brilliant ideas would change the world while making my company a handsome profit. That was before the long nights, the endless weekends, the soul-crushing status reports. Now I'm happy if I can just make it through the day without being humiliated by a cruel co-worker, ending up crying in the farthest men's room stall once again.

Of course, the economy isn't making things any easier. Everyone seems to be working under a state of anxious panic, fearing that they will be the next to be let go. It's made some even more ruthless than I would have previously thought possible. I don't think anyone here will soon forget the tragic conference room 2B incident of February 3rd, nor will anyone be able to forgive the perpetrator (even though he not only got off scot-free but also received a promotion and "revulsion" bonus).

I'm trying to keep my spirits up, mainly by working on my side projects in my spare time. I doubt now is the proper time to reveal any of my daring ideas to upper management, but I'm biding my time. I know any one of these projects could be real money-makers for the company but I also know that no one's willing to take any risks on any crazy ideas from a mid-level employee in this financial environment. But some day... some day my poor, suffering wife and neglected children will understand all the sacrifices I made, all the time and energy I poured into this company. Some day everyone will witness my triumph and all then all the pain and suffering will have been worth it.

I have to remind myself that things haven't always been this bad. I have to think back on the things that I originally loved about this job -- the challenges, the camaraderie of coworkers, the chance to improve the lives of our customers. It's all still possible -- I just need to work past the distractions that have accumulated over the years, scrape off the bilious barnacles of negativity and resentment that poison my work attitude. I need to rediscover the passion I had for this job, this career, this vocation.

I need to remind myself why I became... a SALARYMAN.

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